When life is a soap

Nina is alive and she looks a lot like Y&R's Phyllis. Now that General Hospital has snagged Michelle Stafford, what's ahead for Nina? And who is acting more strangely: Luke or Levi? Pull up a chair for this week's Two Scoops. We've got snacks and there are drinks in the fridge. But, um, dont drink what's in the thermos.

Dear Readers, sometimes we watch soaps solely for the campy entertainment, and other times we watch them for escape. My own life is fairly chaotic right now; my husband and I are at a crossroads in our lives. The company he has worked at for 17 years is packing up shop and moving away just three years before he retires. So, every conversation lately is filled with uncertainty and trying to decide between a myriad of options that all seem really hard.

People ask me "How can you watch soaps when your own life is a soap right now?" and they just don't get it! It's therapeutic. Watching Ava try to cover all her crimes and lies with panic darting across her face every twelve seconds, watching Sabrina and Patrick hover over their tiny premature baby as he struggles for every breath, trying to figure out who Creepy Luke is (some people think Bill Eckert, but I'm in the Anthony Zacharra camp), and watching Madeline and Liesl trade jailhouse barbs truly takes my mind off of my troubles for an hour a day, and for that I am thankful.

I had something extra to be thankful for this week -- a brief sighting of the phenomenal Michelle Stafford. Rumors have been swirling for months that she was coming to General Hospital to assume the role of Nina Clay, but no official confirmation ever came until her beautiful face finally appeared at the end of Thursday's show.

If you aren't a Y&R fan, you might not have been privy to her years of amazing work as Phyllis Newman. I was trying to think of an adequate way to describe Phyllis to the uninitiated, and for GH fans, I have settled upon this one sentence. Phyllis could kick Carly's butt. I have no idea what sort of person Nina Clay will be once she wakes up from her 20-year coma, but I do know that Michelle Stafford has the capacity to become the driving force of the show. Pair her with any powerhouse on the GH canvas and she can hold her own, and probably up their game.

Ms. Stafford can be both tough and tender. Right when you think you hate her character and can never forgive her, she cries, and you melt into a sympathetic puddle. I'm delighted GH snagged her, and I hope she brings some Y&R fans with her to the GH party for a little ratings bonanza. And Sam better up her game because if Nina is anything like Phyllis, there's no way she will stand for another woman winning Silas!

Soap relationships rise and fall on the chemistry between the actors, and one of my top ten all-time couples who had off-the-charts chemistry were Ned and Alexis, or Nexis, if you will. Having Wally Kurth back in town is a bonus in and of itself, but those scenes between him and Nancy Lee Grahn on Friday's show melted my heart and made me nostalgic for Eddie Maine and his leather pants.

I must admit I am biased to any scenes that Nancy Lee Grahn is in because I adore her, just in general. If you don't follow her on social media, you really should. She is witty, smart, opinionated, and bold, and I agree with her on almost everything. I am convinced if we were neighbors, we'd be BFF's (or fellow activists.) I would love to meet her, but not in a creepy stalkery kind of way, just in a liberal-minded, women-of-a-certain-age solidarity sort of way.

Alexis has something she hasn't had in ages, romantic choices! Currently in town are Ric, Ned, and Julian? Ric seems otherwise occupied with Elizabeth, but perhaps Ned can win her away from Julian once Julian's partnership with Creepy Luke is revealed.

Many of you think Creepy Luke is Bill Eckert. Maybe you're right, but I don't recall Bill Eckert being a letch and hitting on young girls, or dealing drugs. I do recall Anthony Zacharra hitting on young girls and moving drugs. I know, I know. Anthony is dead! We saw Johnny shoot him! But, Faison was dead, too and look how that turned out! Also, Creepy Luke has some vendetta against Sonny, but I don't think Bill Eckhert even knew Sonny. However, it should be noted that Bill Eckert is also supposedly dead but did have dealings with Faison, so it's anybody's guess. #teamanthony

The only person who knows the truth is Spencer Cassadine, and he has been bullied out of telling, at least for the moment. Maybe now that his Uncle Victor is back in town, he will confide in him. Victor, I presume, is going to be Nathan West's father, making Nathan a cousin to Nikolas, so since Britt is Nathan's sister, maybe she will get back into Wyndemere for Thanksgiving.

I never thought I would like Britt as much as I like her now. I used to hate her, and every time she came on, I would inwardly cringe. But she's so broken and lost and humbled and beaten down right now that I just can't help but root for her. I would love to see her reconcile with Nikolas at some point. Liz can have Ric, Alexis can have Ned, Britt can have Nik, and Julian can have a time-out to think about what he has done.

Will Julian be a sister-less man when Monday comes? Will he cave in to Creepy Luke's demand to kill Ava, or will he let her go free to hop the flight to Sonny's island? Side note...I want to do Sonny a solid so he will send me off to his island to hide for a while. Julian could get out of shooting Ava very simply: he only has to hint to Sonny that it was Ava who killed Connie, and Sonny would gladly take her down for him.

Imagine how deeply Sonny will regret his crypt sex with Ava once he finds out she is Connie's killer! Sonny has a very odd list of things that turn him on... There was that one time Michael got shot in the head, and he and Carly had "grief sex" in the back of a limo, and now he and Ava had "covering up a murder, losing our minds in a crypt" sex. Eww to both. Morgan really should have told Olivia about Sonny's indiscretion when he had the chance. Heaven forbid Olivia sleep with Sonny again and pick up whatever diseases Ava might have from Morgan, Franco, Silas, Sonny, and heaven knows who else. I'm pretty sure I didn't see any "safe sex" going on in that crypt.

Of course, Sonny is momentarily off the hook, since Ava coerced Carlos into confessing to a murder he didn't commit. He must really, really love Sabrina. She has rejected him multiple times, and yet he would agree to life in prison to protect her? I feel sad for him. But being that this is a soap, the truth will come out eventually. One can only hope that A.J.'s phone recorded the whole juicy exchange with A.J. and Ava and A.J. and Sonny.

Dr. Obrecht is off the hook, too, as she exchanged an embryo packed in a thermos bottle for her freedom. I appreciated the reference to GH history when Scotty brought up his past with Dominique and used it to weigh his decision to allow Dante and Lulu to drop the charges and release Liesl.

Obrecht at first looked smug and victorious as she emerged from her cell, but she didn't read the fine print in the paperwork and is now strapped to an ankle monitor fitted by her newly revealed son, Nathan. I have a hunch she won't be getting any flowers and chocolates for Mother's Day -- but who knows, maybe she can be reformed. (But I hope not.)

Lulu decided to trust that Maxie reformed on her Eat, Pray, Love journey and is willing to try to be friends again. I was delighted by their hug. I've always loved that friendship. For the first order of business, I would suggest that Lulu ask Maxie to consider dumping Levi, although I admit I found him slightly less annoying this week than last week. Not to say he is growing on me, because he isn't, but I despised him slightly less.

On the other hand, I despise Robin just the same as always. Even though we didn't hear her or see her, I hated invisible Robin on the other side of the phone because she wouldn't come home even after Patrick told her his son was born prematurely and that Patrick needed her. If Patrick told me he needed me, I'd be on the next flight to Port Charles, and I wouldn't even pack. I realize this conversation was necessary, because if Patrick and Robin's marriage doesn't end, Patrick can't move on -- and he really needs to move on. Heck, if he sleeps with Britt while Teresa Castillo is on maternity leave, I won't even judge him. (Because like everyone on GH, he is a fictional character.)

Readers, GH has had its ups and downs, but I have to admit I was shocked that GH was shut out of the Daytime Emmy Nominations for both Outstanding Drama and Outstanding Writing. Seriously? The revamped web version of OLTL that was universally panned and cancelled months ago had better writing that GH? I think not. GH's ratings have been up since Ron Carlivati took over as head writer for GH, and as recently as last week, GH was tied for #1 with YR in the key 18-49 year old women demographic.

Oh well, sadly, the Daytime Emmy's aren't what they used to be, they don't enjoy the sort of support they once did, and as of this point, they don't even have a network that will broadcast the event, anyway, so who wins or loses is something we probably won't be able to see unless they live stream it on Soap Central!

What will happen tomorrow, dear readers? Will Baby Drake get a name better than Rocco? Will Dante and Lulu trust Maxie with their embryo thermos and give her another shot at surrogacy? Will Ava try to seduce Michael because he's the only Corinthos guy she hasn't slept with yet? Will Ned, who hasn't been in town for nine years, be the person who realizes something is tragically wrong with Luke where his family and friends have failed?

Will we find Heather with the real Luke caged up in Miscavige as her BLT Love Slave? Will Carly rent out Franco's trendy graffiti room as a specialty suite and get $1000 a night for it? Will Tracy accidentally marry Anthony Zacharra again? (Yeah, Luke is way taller than Anthony, but he could have a mask and shoe lifts, you don't know!) Will Levi get lonely for kangaroos, didgeridoos, Vegemite, and koala bears and go back down under?

Take care and happy viewing,Liz Masters

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