Now the witches are back, and there's hell to pay

Tricks and treats and terror, oh my! The ''Salem Stalker'' has risen! Jordan and Claire went on a killing spree. Ben got reunited with a necktie. And Andre returned to murder again. Yes. It was a killer Halloween in Salem, USA. So, let's carefully reach our hands into a plastic pumpkin and see if we randomly select something sweet, spicy, or all-out scary in this week's DAYS Twooooo Scoooops!

This is one of my favorite two-week stretches of the year. Halloween, the start of November Sweeps, and a certain show's anniversary. There are a ton of reasons to celebrate right now. Pick one. Any of them. Pick them all. There's no wrong answer, and there's plenty of Champagne to go around. Or, well, there will be since there's talk of three weddings in Salem and you know how that goes. At least one will misfire, allowing us to raid the would-be reception's open bar so we can toast to merrier things.

Though, before we begin throwing back the bubbly, I do have some good and bad news. Let's get the unpleasant out of the way first. I'm fairly certain that Princess Gina broke into the DAYS Two Scoops office and stole all of my money! Methinks she was attempting to pilfer the elaborate portrait of Laurisa and me -- not unlike the one of Kate and Sami that replaced the one of Stefano -- and she found our secret safe behind it. I had all my earnings in there. I was saving up to do a big "Beginning of November Sweeps" song and dance number to start off next week's column. Now I'm back to my original plan. So, sorry if you don't like Power Point slideshows with a recorded-from-the-radio version of the Black Eyed Peas' "Let's Get It Started" playing from a boombox in the background. Thankfully, Gina didn't take my Sharp GF-1000. Whew.

The good news, aside from Gina not stealing my boombox? November first marks the day Halloween candy goes on sale! Oh, this has a relevant point. I discovered a new way to deal with any DAYS dissatisfactions. I just scream into a bag of miniature chocolates and rage-eat frozen fun-sized peanut butter cups. Maybe it's the crash from the sugar high afterwards, but it works wonderfully. I'm mellow. Eric says something enraging? Bellow into a bag of Butterfingers. Find either Jordan or Princess Gina maddening? Make that mammoth roar into a sack of Mounds or Almond Joy. You know, one's nuttier than the other. Does Gabi tormenting Lani have you troubled, too? Tell those tiny Halloween-sized Toblerones where to go. It's very beneficial. And delicious. I highly recommend that course of therapy. I'd like to think Doctor Marlena would, too.

Speaking of "delicious," last week was just that! Okay. The Halloween aspects of it were. I'm certainly saving that episode on my DVR. It was a blast filled with costumes, decorations, history nods, hilarious zingers, and campy fun. I already can't wait to see what Ron scares up for next year.

The rest of the week? While I loved the Halloweeniness of it all, other storylines basically circled the airport. Scenes were a bit rinse and rehash. Characters were finding their marks on the floor awaiting their, "And go!" Heck, even the Friday cliffhanger was Gabi expressing, "It's showtime." Yep. We're going to have to wait until next week to see what happens because the last week was setting things up to happen. Or was it? Let's take a look...

Eric, Nicole, and Sarah had an awkward run-in. Xander hilariously got on Eric's nerves. Eric got huffy. Xander goaded Nicole. And -- right. We've heard all that before.

Stop me if you've heard this one, though. We found out that Jordan was still as crazy as a Kristen in heat. Oh. Wait. We knew that, too. Though Rafe found out the hard way. There's that.

Still, we did discover how nasty Gabi can be as she tormented Lani all week. There was even an app for that. Whatsthatnow? We knew that, too? Okay. My bad.

No, no. I got one! We discovered Princess Gina still wants John and -- I hear it now. We got that memo a while back.

So, yep. Last week was a setup one and kind of like a plastic pumpkin full of miscellaneous tricks and treats. You can stick your hand in and not be entirely sure what you're going to pull out. As such, let's continue with this week's Two Scoops "RANDOM THOUGHTS" style! So, grab that cache of candy, maybe a cider or two, and let's try this again.

The first rule of Polite Club: don't disrespect the lemon bar. You will get slapped. Hard. That was hilarious. Nightmare Maggie was a hoot.

Victor's excuse for not attending the wedding was perhaps the most believable one in DAYS history. Ever. He just doesn't like them. In fact, he hates them. Classic Victor.

Oh, Olivia Rose Keegan -- welcome back, welcome back, welcome back! *insert heart emoji* Even if it's only for a day, I loved seeing her take on Claire again. I'll take what I can get. Olivia's still so wickedly wonderful.

And speaking of "Welcome back!" -- hello, Marilyn McCoo! Wow. She looks, as Marlena would say, "Fabulous!" I'll add gorgeous to that list, too.

I also totally forgot that Tamara and Mar were college roommates. I really want to sit by her at the reception and get all the gossip on Doc Evans: The Early Years. Was there really an Alex North? Did they have a child? Was Samantha Evans actually the nicer sister? Tell me, Tamara. Tell me.

I wonder if Sonny saw any familiar faces while watching his Friday the 13th marathon? I hear the character "Sissy Baker" from Jason Lives looks a lot like Lexie Carver. *stage wink*

Oh. Why did I try to be clever? Now I just miss Rene Jones as Lexie.

Eric and Nicole looked cute in their costumes. Still, they're totally more "Stephanie and Michael" than "Sandy and Danny," unless Eric dresses up like Sandy. I've never been certainer.

Rory is hosting a Halloween party!? It won't smell like weed and bad choices. At all.

Oh, boy. Princess Gina still believes John is her destiny. Let's hope no submarines will be harmed in the making of this storyline -- this time. Eek. Though, it would be kind of funny if Gina met Brady and fell for him like Special K did. And then, of course, we'd have a Gina vs. Kristen showdown. That combo would be nuttier than a Planters Party Mix. Or simply a Susan Banks level of nuttiness.

I enjoy when Ron digs into the DAYS history books! The "Salem Stalker" throwbacks were a nice touch, and I loved the he brought up that Tony was stranded on that island for so long.

Wowza. Talk about Halloween creeptasticness! Chrishell Hartley plays psycho so unbelievable well, and Camila Banus just does devious downright dazzlingly. These two talented actors earn every cent of their paychecks and more!

John said, "I don't think I've ever seen Hope wear that shade [of lipstick] before." Fair. That's fair. I'm sure after the "Hope P.M." saga, there are a lot of Salemites who track her lipstick usage just in case.

Will and Ciara's conversation about Ben was interesting. They should think of having that again in real time, not Dream Land.

Marilyn McCoo's husband, Billy Davis Jr., as Eli's FBI mentor "Billy" was awesome!

Marlena brought up Zack. I'm not misty-eyed. You are. I will never not get all sad when thinking of Bope's Tiny Man. That storyline haunts me.

Lani is one lovely bride! She looked amazing. To be fair, Eli looked handsome, too.

Claire mocked Bayview's security. Ha! Even the crazies know it's lackluster. Maybe they could hire Hope as a security guard. She needs a new gig, unless Princess Gina-ing is a paid position. That I do not know.

Is Gina's evil lair a refurbished redo of John's classic loft? If so (and I think it's so), that's very fitting. And kind of awesome. I loved that place.

Is someone conducting a poll to bet on if Ciara is pregnant or not? If so, I'm sliding a crisp George Washington across the table. Please add it to the "Probably" pile.

Another bet? My odds are on Ben being set up for a crime Jordan committed. I mean, Ciara even said that his sister is probably setting him up. Ciara is actually right quite a bit. Though we saw Jordan later, Ben returning with David and without Psycho Tammy Sue seemed like far-reaching foreshadowing. Hmm!

It's a nice touch that Tamara returned for a wedding, as she initially premiered attending one.

Did anyone else wonder why Rafe didn't call Hope while he was cooped up in his hospital bed? I mean, she's a former cop and, you know, the mother of the intended target.

You know that scene in Bridesmaids where Megan gets on top of Annie and slaps her until she gets some fight back? That. That's what I wish I could do for Lani right now. I know she has a spark in her, but she's sort of just standing there taking it from Gabi. Lani, you're a detective. You can be badass. Couldn't you use some connections, or at least one of Eli or Rafe's "I Know A Guy" sources, to have Gabi's cell phone service shut down then expose Yo Gabba Gabi? Lani's not being blackmailed. Gabi has nothing on her. Gabi's basically fast on her phone. That's it. Lani, you got this if you want it. If nothing else, Eli's swoon-worthy smile should be enough motivation to anyone ready to rumble.

Hold up. I thought John and Marlena were off strawberries. Eh. I guess they have Resurrection by Wilhelm readily available now should they get a poisonous one again.

I still love that Claire calls Victor "Pop Pop." Even if it's in a nightmare. Before she killed him.

Every time I see that flashback of Jordan baking the cupcakes while wearing a white sweater under her apron, I simply think, "Dang, she's brave for baking in white!" Maybe "She's crazy for baking chocolate cupcakes in white" is a bit more on the nose. Eh?

Arianna and Holly looked adorable in their costumes! I'm glad Eric and Nicole participated in Halloween. Will and Sonny must have been too busy doing important, umm, freelance/unemployed people who live in a mansion things to throw something together. We'll go with that.

Boo. I hate everything about Val not being able to attend the wedding. No Val makes me the something blue.

Also getting my eyes a little wet was when Jennifer presented Lani with Alice's favorite bag. Oh, Alice. You'll be forever missed.

The necklace from Lani's grandmother was sweet, too, but for the gut-punch was Maggie presenting a blue handkerchief made from David Abraham's receiving blanket. Nice touch, DAYS. Nice touch. Now hand me that handkerchief as my eyes are watery. Someone must be cutting onions around here. That's it. That's got to be it.

I'm impressed by Jordan's forearm strength. I got confirmation from a trusted source (okay, it was Laurisa), and she confirmed that, one, car seats are heavy, and, two, car seats with a baby in them are even heavier. I guess Jordan spent more time working on her arm muscles than her sanity at Bayview.

Someone needs to page my favorite hospital employee ever. It became painfully clear how much we need Nurse Maxine back when Haley was tasked with keeping Rafe in his bed. I admire that Haley -- as Jordan might say -- believes that she believes that she could do that, but Rafe would be too afraid to even blink if Maxine shot him just one of her looks.

Sarah cracks me up. Her "That's a hard no" to Xander was amazing. I love that she can basically say anything to him, and he still fawns all over her.

Props to Ciara for keeping it classy. I kind of thought she'd pull her middle finger out of Ben's coat pocket and present it to Jordan.

Both Ben and Lani get some mad points for attempting to deal with maddening people. Ben was on it when he said, "I've been where you are. Let me help you and take care of you." Lani was spot-on when she attempted to appeal to Gabi by stating that she understood her pain, but causing more pain wouldn't bring peace and that Gabs should concentrate on recovery, maybe get some help from Mar Mar and focus on Arianna. Ben and Lani are right. No doubt. And Jordan and Gabi totally listened to that sage advice. I kid. I kid. They're still on a delusional and rather vicious warpath.

Um. Why aren't Jack and Jennifer having sleepovers at her house? You'd think that would be a little more comfortable, more so, less icky than the place he stayed with Eve. Also, it would have been a better touch had Lani gotten ready at the Horton home.

Tamara is going to sing again, right? She must! Maybe a little "Up Where We Belong" for old times' sake? Crossing fingers in five, four, three...

With all due respect to the Halloween episode, there was something even more terrifying brought up last week. That's the reminder that nobody knows where Stefano is, and he can strike at any moment. *Shudders* I can almost hear his sinister, bellowing belly laugh echoing through Salem now.

HOT Everything about the Halloween episode was spectacular, but Deidre Hall stole the show for me! There is a reason she's a leading lady, and our lady is hilarious. I love when the show lets Deidre flex her comedic chops. You could just tell she was having a grand time, too. Loved the lines. Loved the mask. Loved it all. Love you, Dee!

NOT Was I the only one who exclaimed, "Oh, my God, Eric. Seriously!?" when he replied to Sarah, "What tough time?" Look. I wasn't pushing people over in some type of Black Friday doorbuster sale stampede way to get on the "Sarah and Eric 4Ever" fan bus, but, holy Father John Black and all one hundred of his retconned backstories, Eric. He acts like he's got the pain market cornered and is vying to become the next Dawson Leery crying meme. Stop, Eric. Stop. He needs to talk to someone. Maybe someone at the Horton Center who is compassionate and hands out life advice for individuals going through tough times could help. Oh. Right. He is that guy. Usually.

LINE(S) OF THE WEEK "Salem Stalker" Marlena (to Jordan): "Oh, put down the shovel, Tammy Sue."

Marlena (to John): "Oh, come on. A movie about a woman who is possessed by the devil? I mean isn't that just a little far-fetched?"

Victor (to Maggie): "I'm in no mood for morality lectures."

EXCHANGE(S) OF THE WEEK Claire: "I did some very bad things. So, umm, I came here to turn myself in." Ciara: "What kind of bad things?" Claire: "Well, first I killed Haley Chen..." Ciara: "For real!?" Claire: "Oh, yeah."

Eric: "Why don't I take over candy duty while you get some, umm, clothes on." Xander: "I'm turning you on, am I?"

Claire: "I can't believe this! All anybody ever wants is just Ciara, Ciara, Ciara! Well, first she was the face of Bella magazine, and now she's in the Titan Executive Training Program, and I'm not!?" Victor: "Well, we didn't think you'd be eligible being in the bin and all."

MORE RANDOM THOUGHTS Regarding Tony on that island, I still believe there's a DiMera/Islander child somewhere out there. As charming as Tony is, there's no way he didn't enchant a local or two. That would still be a great way to introduce some next generation DiMeras onto the screen and keep Tony and Anna around with a new storyline.

Bringing up Nighttime Hope reminded me of Doc Baker! Aww. That scoundrel.

Since Halloween is all about a scare or two, you know what else creeps me out? The chilling introduction music to Unsolved Mysteries! It's the second eeriest tune I can think of -- the first being the "Oompa Loompa" song from Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory. It terrifies me. Yeah, there's a lot to unpack there, so I digress. But I do have a suggestion for a storyline...

Ron should clear up the (mostly forgotten about) ambiguity of Emily Hudson. She was Rafe's one-time fiance. Her sister Meredith didn't believe Emily died in a mere car accident on her wedding day. And Meredith carried a trusty brick. I'd kind of like to see this mystery solved.

PARTING THOUGHTS So, friends and fellow DAYS fans, that's it for November 4! If you're still in need of even more DAYS holiday fun, be sure to check out the annual Two Scoops Halloween in Salem column! With that, I'll be back next week with a 54-candled cake to celebrate all things DAYS. And, "That's a fact!"

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