I am not the doctor

Did we witness the best doctor vs. doctor scene ever? Could Andre still be alive? Is Chad losing his mind, too? Let's discuss it all in this edition of Two Scoops!

As Abigail was crying about missing chunks of time and not knowing what day it was, I felt a kindred spirit to her. A deep one. I've felt the exact same way over the past few weeks. Of course, mine is caused by having a newborn at home. Abigail, on the other hand, is bat poo nutso. And it's making for some grand soap!

Okay, yes, there is a lot here that's slapped together. I need this nonsense of "Gabi killed before" to stop. The situation with Nick is way more nuanced than it's being referenced. It's gone on long enough -- and by too many characters who aren't mentally ill -- that it feels like victim shaming now. Trask, especially, needs to shut it.

Also, Gabi really doesn't have a temper. If she did, she'd have unleashed holy hell upon Abigail for the whole Gabi/Abigail/Chad situation. Or perhaps she'd have done something sinister to Lani after she slept with another one of Gabi's boyfriends. Yet, she made no effort to hurt Abigail, hold onto Chad, or teach Lani a lesson. So, this argument that Gabi has a temper doesn't check out with what we've seen play out on-screen for the last few months.

However, I'm willing to overlook a lot of that because Marci Miller is werrrrking it in this storyline. She's masterfully blending the over-the-top camp that comes with this soap staple storyline with the subtle changes in her performance that keep us engaged. It's a fine line to walk. And Marci is strutting down that line with flare.

As predictable as it was for Ron to take over and give Abs DID, it does ring true for her character. She's mentally frail, anyway, and does have a family history of mental illness. The real mystery here is why Abigail killed Andre! I thought for sure one of the alters did it. But it turns out that Abigail really did fire the urn.

Granted, I never liked the rewrite that Andre brought Abigail back to Chad. (He literally did the opposite -- faked her death for her.) But, Andre and Abigail certainly had a friendship of sorts. Still, this is Andre we're talking about here. I wouldn't put it past him to recognize Abigail is the Achilles heel of both Stefan and Chad. Could he have faked his own death to send Abigail down a mental health spiral, thus taking lovesick Chad and Stefan with her, opening the way for him to have control of DiMera? Hmm...

Either way, I have a feeling Gabi's going to get a guilty verdict. That will give Rafe and Eli an excuse to keep digging. Plus, Justin put up zero defense and doesn't deserve to win this case at all. (Really, Justin?) But it's not all bad. Gabi going to jail offers the possibility of a Hattie sighting, please. Something tells me she'll be happy to team up with another gal who's not fond of Andre.

Across town, Lani doesn't need any alters to mess up lives. She's doing this business all on her own!

In the Lani vs. Val situation, I could not be more anti-Lani if I tried. Sure, Val shouldn't have snooped. It's absolutely illegal. But the mess Lani created was so much more reckless. Lani getting mad at Val is like a drunk driver complaining that the other person in the accident had expired tags.

I'd say Abe yelling at Val is punishment enough. James Reynolds is one of the scariest people in all of soapdom to yell at you. Plus, I'm glad Val didn't regret what she did. She shouldn't. If I give Abe a pass for sticking up for Lani (which I totally do because "Father Abraham" is one of the best), I can't deny Val a little leeway for sticking up for her son.

At the end of the day, I'm just glad everyone abandoned the witch hunt for Val. Lani's going to need a miracle doc on her side, and Val did save Abe's life. Now that she's officially a high-risk pregnancy, more medical complications are sure to come Lani's way. Something tells me Julie's not going to subscribe to the "don't stress Lani out" plan.

As for Abe, he needs to hold onto this woman. Look, I loved Lexie. But "wife Lexie" wasn't the greatest. Val hasn't looked at a-one of Abe's family members in that way. That's an improvement!

LOOSE ENDS: As a new mom, I have a whole new affection for Jeneric. I'm thankful for anything that gives me an excuse to sleep these days.

I'm on board with Will working for the Spectator. He needs a job. Plus, dipping into his investigative side might actually help us get back to the business of him getting his memory back. We've seemed to kind of drop that storyline in favor of Paul/Will, Part 2. Chandler Massey and Christopher Sean's chemistry is both easy and exciting. I'd love to be totally on board with this pairing. But I need Will to get his memory back and still choose Paul for that to happen.

Chad and Stefan played strip chess. Only instead of clothes, they used secrets. And Chad was oh-so-very bad at it. He wasted turns asking three different questions (Did you/your mom/the dark-haired lady kill Andre?) when he should have just asked, "Who killed Andre?" His new beard might be taking away his brain power.

Riddle me this: Marlena just met Abigail's host alter, confirming Abigail is deep in DID. What other emergency could possibly warrant Marlena leaving Abigail with nothing more than a pinky swear Abs will return the next day?! It's a shame Mar's office isn't close to a hospital or anything. #docfail

Is Leo malicious? Because I kind of like him with Sonny! He's a little quirky and mischievous, and those types of characters bring out the best in Sonny (see: Victor). I panicked a bit when Sonny declared how honest Leo is, though. That seems to indicate were headed for another morality sermon from Reverend Kiriakis. Those are not my favorite.

Justin and Adrienne are embarking on another Everything We Do Is Awesome Tour. First, they had a romantic cheeseburger dinner, which is just about the greatest idea ever. Then, they were legitimately delighted that Sonny was dating again. Adrienne's enthusiasm over her son's happiness was downright adorable.

HOT: Marci Miller tweeted about getting to finally work with Deidre Hall. This scene did not disappoint. I ate up every minute of Dr. Evans -- in her full stern eye best -- trying to out-shrink Dr. Lauragail. Marci threw all of it back in one of the most divalicious scenes we've gotten in awhile. Yasss, queens. Yes!

Honorable Mention: The scene with Kayla, Steve, and Stefan was a glorious Easter egg of a soap gift. For those DAYS fans whose soap fandom doesn't overlap, Stephen Nichols and Mary Beth Evans played Tyler Christopher's uncle and (sorta) aunt on General Hospital. There was also a love triangle thrown in there. Oh, and Stephen Nichols' GH character was named "Stefan." Because, of course, it was. I love soaps.

NOT: Stefan is infatuated with an alter, which might be endearing if he didn't know she was an alter. But he does. So now, rather than just being one of those despicable male bosses who sexually harasses his employees, he's also the predatory dude who wants to target a woman too mentally incapacitated to say no. Great. To top it all off, Vivian is against this. You know it's bad when Vivian tells you something you want is bonkers!

LINE OF THE WEEK: Gabigail (to Dr. Lauragail) "We're three personalities inside one person! You really want to talk to me about insane?" Ha! Even alters have jokes!

RANDOM THOUGHTS: Well, shoot. I thought J.J. was going to be a good father. But then he went and got the kid Cubs ticket. Bad move, J.J.

It wasn't lost on me that Chad was the white pieces and Stefan the black.

I wonder if, when meeting Dr Laura, Marlena thought, "Ugh. More competition for the town blue office."

I loved Leo's confetti shirt and camel jacket. Yes, sir!

Every bit of the styling for Judi Evans -- the shorter hair, the jewel tones -- was fantastic.

If Abe and Val marry, Val will be both grandmother and stepgrandmother to baby "Elani." Same goes for Abe as grandfather and stepgrandfather. I love soaps.

Laura Kai Chen is too good of an actress for Melinda Trask to be written as such a one-note character. I'd love for her to stay around Salem, but she needs a lot more depth.

Steve's new look reminds me of the Terminator via Barry Gibb.

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