Lay down, Sally

Sally got more comeuppance than most B&B wrongdoers, being thrown under the bus to prop Flatt and then receiving a pink slip. But Steffy got a new crush, and Ridge got a second marriage certificate! Sign on the dotted line with Two Scoops' Mike!

Has your week been bold and beautiful? Did you finally get mentioned after having your face on a milk carton for a decade? Did you need to go back to your doctor for heart palpitations? Did you learn you took one too many gambles in Vegas? These and more situations faced the Forrester-Logan-Spencer-Spectra-Fulton clan this week!

All right, Scoopers! We are into Week Three of new episodes, and while I like where some of the post-shutdown stories are going, others are driving me nuts. I was sorry to hear that Courtney Hope has been let go as Sally, because the character really deserved more. Then recovering accident victim Steffy got new medicine in the form of Finn, and Ridge learned he's got an entry-level harem going on because he has two wives! Ready? Let's Scoop about it!

Oh, before I begin...I will allow all COVID workarounds and not make fun of them, tempting as it may be. Yes, some of the close-ups of hands and backs and such feel a little weird. And it was so obvious Ridge was kissing a bewigged mannequin when he and Brooke were making up. But I'm choosing to laugh with it, not at it. B&B is doing what it can to give us a show when the studio could still easily be locked up! Free pass granted.

JELL-O HAS MORE BACKBONE

Sally and Steffy were in the hospital at the same time, but the frenemies never knew it. Too bad they never paid each other a visit! Instead, Sally continued her visit with Wyatt, who had come to see her after her stress-related faint. She begged for forgiveness to the point that even she noted, "I feel like I just keep rambling." That's not just a feeling, Sal.

Her "I'm dying" scheme was wrong, wrong, wrong, and ultimately pointless, because Wyatt isn't worth it. But I needed a nurse to come by and take the baseball bat out of Sally's hand, because she couldn't stop beating herself up. When Sally first arrived in 2017, she was spunky and strong! She made mistakes and committed crimes, but she was never pathetic. When Spectra collapsed, did it crush all the spirit out of her?

Seriously, that's about when Sally lost her Spectra mojo. She cried that she had reverted back to the old Sally Spectra who would do anything to get what she wanted. Um, no. That Sally only grudgingly went along with her grammy's plan to steal Forrester designs via webcam. Sally made herself sound like she had out-Bonnied Bonnie from Bonnie and Clyde.

When the O.G. Sally got snagged trying to get pregnant with Jack's baby to keep him away from Stephanie, did she sob to everyone about how awful she was? No! I don't mind Sally getting real and admitting she never had a chance with Wyatt, or her truly taking responsibility for her admittedly heartless scam. But that Flo was held up as some kind of ultimate victim, while Sally was lower than dirt, enraged me.

I liked that Sally acknowledged Flo's misdeeds by pointing out, "I know that you know what it's like to get caught up in a lie" and to receive forgiveness. But then Flo got all indignant and was like, "I paid for my lies and mistakes. I'm still paying!" How? With that $50,000 she took from Reese as payment for pretending to be Beth's birth mother? Honey, at least Sally didn't make any bank from her scheme.

NOT GOING WITH THE FLO

I thought maybe it was just me whose last nerve Flo was getting on, but it turns out Ms. Fulton really doesn't have that many fans:

"I cannot understand why Sally is being treated this way for that rotten Flo that no one likes." -- Jennifer

"The more they try to prop Flo, the more I despise her, especially when they ruin a character like Sally to do it." -- "DaffySez"

"Can't believe [they're] sacrificing Sally for Felony Flo." -- Timothy

"Flo SUCKS! [B&B] needs to realize no one likes her and never will." -- "Doreen2"

Do we legit have any Flo fans out there? Because all I'm hearing is crickets. I'm not against a character pulling shady ish and then being redeemed. Hell, I am still Team Sheila all day every day! What's so annoying about Flo is that she aided an illegal adoption, took money to do it, and spent five minutes in jail while everyone goes on about how selfless she is.

Yes, Flo did donate a kidney to Katie and willingly gave up her boyfriend so Sally could spend her "last days" with him. But, as Flo herself said, she's not a saint. Can we please stop genuflecting to Saint Flo? I didn't need to see three episodes of her playing all high and mighty and gushing demurely as Wyatt, Katie, and Shauna praised her, or see Flo getting to relish in Wyatt's D because she, er, came out on top.

If this were the B&B of old, Flo would have been gone by the time she said "Beth isn't dead." Yeah, Sheila stayed on for years after getting a rap sheet, but she was a fan favorite. Speaking of gone, why are Maya, Xander, Taylor, and Reese still in the credits? Y'all had three months off in lockdown and couldn't have turned off Netflix long enough to do a little catch-up editing?

THAT'S WHAT FRIENDS ARE FOR?

Anyway, Wyatt said "Bye, Felicia" to Sally and told her to stay away from him and Flo. "You need to find that incredible woman again" were his parting words. Well, amen to that, Solar Shower Boy. Unfortunately, Sally's been written off, and for all we know, her last scene could be with Katie, who was not happy Sally played her for a fool. "You're better than that!" Katie yelled. Double amen.

One nugget that came out of Sally's repeated groveling was her own surprise regarding Katie's friendship: "for once, someone could actually care about me." Think about it -- Sally's parents were carnies who were so drugged up, Shirley had to raise her. Then Thomas dumped her for Caroline twice, Liam was never into her, and Wyatt dumped her twice. Made me feel Sally has had a long life of unfulfillment.

Still, her claim that Katie was "as true a friend as I've ever had" rang hollow to me. When were they actually friends? Sally confided in Katie about her "condition" a few times, but that was about it. I wish we could have kept Sally on and gradually restored her to the feisty Spectra she was when she first showed up in her yellows and stripes. She became as dull as her wardrobe did. And that's truly a soap tragedy. We'll miss ya, Sal.

PILL-OW TALK

Back in the hospital, Steffy took that old medication commercial to heart: "I haven't got time for the pain." She had decided her new superpower was toughing out her injuries, no matter how high the threshold got. That struck me as odd. I mean, how many times has Steffy been hospitalized now? ATV rollovers, ski slope collisions, the first motorcycle skid-out? Steffy's never resisted drugs before.

Dr. Finnegan had to tell Ridge to make sure Steffy took her meds, and there was an implication that Ridge had experienced having cracked ribs. I had to check -- according to his character profile, Ridge has gotten banged up in any number of other ways over three decades, but there's no record of rib injuries. So, I'm not sure where that came from.

One injury Ridge held to was that Bill was responsible for Steffy's accident. It was kind of like Ridge thinking Bill had raped Steffy all over again. At least Bill was actually sufficiently remorseful, amazingly so, and even Steffy told her one-time sword wearer that enough was enough with the apologies. Though I think, after two car accidents, he might want to add glasses to his bearded mug.

Hope helped Liam (and the off-screen Kelly) decorate Steffy's house ahead of Steffy's homecoming. Hope had also helped care for Kelly in Steffy's absence, and, after firing off another helmet PSA, Hope made a lot of noise about how wonderful it was to have Kelly and Beth together. Kelly could stay with her as long as needed. Weird, or weird? Though I do agree it was good of Hope to help out, given her history with Steffy.

Well, even before Steffy got home, she said no less than three times that she didn't want to feel out of it or be groggy with Kelly. She refused to take her pills. Until she started staring at the bottle. Was Chanel right in last week's column that we've got a budding addiction storyline on our hands? When Steffy finally took a pill against her better judgment, she didn't even swallow it with water. Now that's a superpower.

AND NOW I'M BACK TO LET YOU KNOW I CAN REALLY SHAKE 'EM DOWN

With Steffy in her hospital bed, Brooke suggested Ridge call Taylor! He did, and Taylor sent flowers. Moreover, Ridge decided he should call Thomas. Where the hell was Thomas, anyway? He bolted out of his wedding to Zoe after his obsession with Hope was laid bare, then went AWOL. So, Ridge has known where Thomas has been the whole time?

Turned out I didn't need to ask any more questions, because Thomas showed up himself to talk about his whereabouts! I think he said...something, but I was too deafened by how fine he looked in that new beard he was sporting. It was almost enough to make me forgive him for the foolishness he made me sit through for a year...almost.

Thomas revealed he had been logging in a lot of alone time, reflecting while driving up and down California's coast and stopping wherever the spirit moved him. That's great, but shouldn't he have been in a psych ward? Thomas had apparently talked to Taylor constantly, but that doesn't reassure me. Not unless Taylor has finally, once again, become the sane, sensible shrink we knew and loved.

Thomas had been in touch with Douglas enough to tell him about Steffy's accident, and he'd been getting support from Ridge. And it seems he's staying with Vinny again. Man, Vinny is one forgiving friend. Vinny had also sent Thomas with flowers and candy for Steffy, apparently nursing a big crush on her. Didn't Vinny have an off-screen girlfriend? Steffy and Sally aren't gonna be the only ones to spend time in a hospital.

At any rate, Thomas had rehabilitated enough to see his sister was fully frontin' when it came to pain management. "You can stop pretending now," he said as Steffy kept trying to tough it out. He pointed out that her meds were there for a reason. I hope Thomas is on some meds. Hot as he looks in the beard, I can't forgive this guy for gaslighting his son and using everyone to get Hope. Maybe he needs to be with Flo!

BRING ON THE HUCKLEBERRIES

Left home alone...wait, let's stop right there. Who in the hell thought it was a good idea for Steffy to fumble around the house and take care of a toddler by herself? You'd think Ridge would be superglued to her, and/or that Liam would be sniffing around, taking care of Steffy and serving her waffles. It makes no sense that Steffy would be on her own unless there had been a scene with her demanding privacy.

Which there wasn't. Perhaps this was so Steffy could stare at her pill bottle again. Though, instead of developing an addiction, she was definitely only taking them as a last resort. Which begs the question, why was she almost out? If she had to be forced into taking the things, her bottle should be pretty full. Did the pharmacy just give her a starter pack?

It didn't matter, because Dr. Finnegan called out of nowhere to check on his star patient. Man, whatever health care plan she's got that provides that kind of service, sign me up. She kind of nodded through his insistences that she take it easy and take her meds, but not far down, she was as giddy...as a girl would be who just got a care call from a hunky doctor. I mean.

Later, Steffy's doorbell rang. How novel -- so many other people just barge in, I didn't even know she had a doorbell. Steffy checked her door camera app and smiled to see her visitor was the good doctor. AWWWWWW YEAHHHHHH! He admitted he didn't usually stop by to visit released patients, but he lived nearby. Well, that's better than, "Haven't I seen you somewhere before," right?

Steffy wanted to take the opportunity to thank him for everything he had done for her, and they made jokes about Finnegan being one of those old-time house call doctors who gets rewarded with pie after performing an emergency appendectomy. Steffy playfully sassed that he'd need a travel bag if his visits were to become a habit, and we learned he had lurked on da Innerwebs to find out more about her...

Lo -- are those sparks flying? Like a sparkler bought at an illegal fireworks counter? Hell to the yeah! Given B&B's usual romantic pace, Steffy and the doc would be married by now. I love that they are giving us more of a slow burn instead. Please keep that up. Not only is that better soap making for a better payoff, but hot damn, I need a slow-developing romance to live vicariously through right now.

Steffy found out that the doctor's friends and colleagues called him "Finn," and she could barely keep a straight face. They then did that little dance where you try to find out more about the other without being too obvious. Finn didn't have kids, yet he found out Steffy was a single mom. Then he pointed to the giant Sears Portrait Studio pic of Steffy and Liam. I think, for the first time, she felt embarrassed about having it up.

Finally, Finn noted that Steffy's crash hadn't been her first. He advised her to stay off the choppers and asked if he could check on her from time to time. Steffy liked that idea, and the doc said semi-seductively, "You wanna call me 'Finn'," to which Steffy answered, "So bad!" She got all goo-goo eyed as Finn left, and it was a joy to see. What a great beginning! Excuse me while I get my smelling salts and faint on a divan!

IT'S ALWAYS GOOD TO HAVE A SPARE

Poor Donna. She's been back on contract almost two years, there was a three-month gap in filming, and still, all she gets to do is be Brooke's sounding board. It's just wrong. Brooke had been happy that she and Ridge had gotten to function as a family at Steffy's bedside but lamented that Bill's culpability in Steffy being there had kind of put a downer on the whole thing.

When Ridge showed up, Brooke noted that she, along with a lot of other people, had caused hurt. "Well, I should be on that list," Ridge recognized. Well, finally! Running around acting like his crazy son was normal and blasting Brooke for calling Thomas out was not Ridge's best look. And Ridge has had a lot of looks over the years. "Maybe I overreacted," he conceded. Cripes, now that's more like it.

In between kissing the mannequin, Brooke announced she was heading off to New York to see Bridget...and LOGAN! Holy soap gods, when was the last time we even heard about this kid? I mean, he was born on-screen in 2010. So, by SORAS standards, he should be 30 about now. Anyway, Brooke had already made her plans, not expecting a reunion with Ridge, so Bridge agreed she should fly as scheduled.

Meanwhile, at Wyatt's pad, Shauna showed up, to Flo's delight. And to our chagrin, we had to hear about Sally's misdeeds again while Wyatt yammered on about how selfless and compassionate Flo was. I nearly lost my lunch. But Flo knew Shauna hadn't come back for nothing. How many times has this woman moved back and forth from Vegas in the last year? Ain't enough change-of-address cards in the world...

Shauna played coy to the hilt, interestingly commenting how irresistible Ridge is when he speaks Italian. If that was a nod to all of B&B's Italy remotes, I'm for it! Flo went so far as to ask Shauna if she had slept with Ridge, but Shauna still wouldn't kiss and tell. Any woman who can go three decades not knowing who fathered her daughter has no room to act all innocent.

Over at the Forrester mansion, Quinn was so smug and unapologetic that I just wanted to throw a martini in her face. She was sure that Ridge would leave Brooke. Fortunately, Eric piped up with something I've been needing to hear on this show since before the shutdown. "That'd be a little hypocritical of him, wouldn't it, leaving Brooke over one kiss? How many kisses did he share with Shauna?"

God, Eric, I love you! Quinn tried a certain strain of logic infesting our world right now, eye-rolling that that was an entirely different situation. I can't believe how much I'm coming to hate this character. Anyway, Ridge burst in, declaring he was moving back in with Brooke! But then, Shauna burst in, declaring it was hard to stay away from her husband! What the actual hell?

Shauna recapped her drunken Vegas night with Ridge, which he didn't remember. Girl, if your only sweet moments with your man are when he's bombed out of his mind, run, do not walk, to the nearest exit. Shauna did some song and dance about how she'd stayed away because it had stung that Ridge didn't remember their chapel wedding or the fact that he had asked her to move back to Los Angeles!

Eric and Ridge couldn't believe it. I couldn't believe it. (Quinn, however, believed it. Had she been clued in?) Shauna was Ridge's wife! Now, hold the phone, missy! Last we heard, Ridge had never filed his petition to divorce Brooke. He'd been keeping it in his desk drawer. So, is Ridge a bigamist now? That would be new...ish. Or did Quinn somehow file the papers on Ridge's behalf? I smell something stinky!

That's all I got for ya! What are your thoughts on Ridge and Shauna's apparent marriage? How do you feel about Sally leaving, and the way she's leaving? Does Thomas being back bug you, or are you okay with it? And how do you feel about the pace of a potential romance between Steffy and Finn? Lay it down in the Comments section below or the Soap Central message boards, or simply click here to submit feedback. Your comments could wind up in a future column!

Oh, by the way, can Penny just go home already? Just sayin'.

We've got some questionable stories going on, but so far, Steffy and Finn's slight flirtation is rising to the top! If Sinn actually gets together, will they be worth the wait? Keep watching, be alert, and most of all, be bold. And remember: wearing a mask to help tamp down a virus and respecting everyone -- even when they're different than you -- is always beautiful!

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